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Important Note: The current book cover is only a sample generated with the help of AI on Canva. It's only temporary. The real book cover is still in progress.

About "The 'Before 20' Bucket List"

by Gabrielle Lopez

Publish Date: *still waiting*

ISBN: *in the works*

Shop TB20BL: *coming soon, in stores and online*

Stay tuned for now for updates on the release.

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The Blurb:

Leslie Laurel is tired of spending her Friday nights at home.

For the past three years, she’s watched through her window as Ezra Deseo, her best friend and literal boy-next-door, lives his best life. Meanwhile, she’s turning 20 in a month, but she feels like she hasn’t done anything worthy of looking back on someday. Why can’t she be out on the dance floor or in the pictures like everybody else? Seeing that this is her last chance to be truly young, Leslie makes a bucket list to finish ‘Before 20’, which is when the real crazy of real life as an adult begins. From going to her first party to getting a tattoo, from making friendship bracelets to making unexpected friends, Leslie sets out to try new things and do the stuff of teenage dreams.

She gets Ezra to do the list with her—because who better to help out the good girl than the cool guy, right? Together, they ride the drop tower, have a picnic at the park, and go dancing in a club. But when Ezra starts seeing someone new, can she do it all on her own? And why does it affect her to see him go on without her?

Leslie’s going to have to read between the lines on her bucket list to realize what she truly wants and go for it. Growing up is a mess, but what if it can be a masterpiece once she learns to be brave and true to herself? And what if the bravest thing to do in life is the one she hasn’t let herself dare to try? But it’s one that’s always been there—just outside her window…

Read on for excerpts from the book…

Late Night Thoughts

Adulting

The Bucket List

And I think, That could be me.

I could be out on Friday nights meeting friends and kissing strangers in bars, dancing to the same music every time but enjoying it anyway because we're drunk, not just on alcohol but this feeling—

This feeling that I know I'm missing.

I can almost imagine that feeling right now in bed while morning starts to greet me through my windows. I'm sleepless but not in the best way, and the feeling is gone because it's only a fantasy.

I want it to be real, I realize. I want to feel like everybody else does: like infinity, like nothing will ever be this good again. Like life can't get better than this, here, now, but knowing at the same time that I'm not going to be young forever, so it's best to make the most of where I am.

I see Ezra again, this time in a video. He's dancing with the same girl, his hands on her waist, their bodies in sync—and my heart clenches because I realize I envy him. He's free, and he's full of infinite moments like this, and he's there.

Meanwhile, I'm turning 20 in a month, and I've barely done anything worthy of looking back on when I turn 60 someday. Everybody's living their teenage dreams while I stay in bed and stare at ceilings on Saturday mornings, sleepless and in solitude.

I turn on my other side, closing my eyes against these pictures that aren't even my own memories. I ignore the bright morning even as I feel the clock ticking.

Next month, I'll be a real adult. Even the age itself says it all: right now, at 19, I'm still technically a teen. But come next month, I'll be 20, and while the number isn't normally paraded around like a big deal—unlike 18 or 21, 30 or 40—I get the feeling that it's the start of what older people like to call "real life", which is when they say, "Welcome to the real world."

I will have to be the worry-about-money, find-love-before-30, and work-my-way-up-at-work type of adult. Turning 18 is really just about doing crazy things and being young one last time before the real crazy begins of being in our 20s.

So I know it like an instinct: I have to do this.

Still, I'm nervous as I think about telling Ezra about the bucket list.

"The 'Before 20' Bucket List." Ezra's amused smile is so huge his eyes crinkle and almost disappear.

"Number one," he reads out loud. I look around us to see if anyone is listening, but everyone is too busy doing their own thing, scuttling to classes before the hour starts, talking amongst themselves, or listening to music, to notice Ezra announcing my deepest secrets like he's presenting a pitch to a client.

"Ezra, stop it."

"Go to a party—a real one." If he recognizes his own words to me from last Friday night, he doesn't show it. "Hmm very specific. Number two—"

"Didn't you learn how to read silently?"

"—go out of town with friends." At this, Ezra looks at me and smiles sweetly, though it's not enough to get me to stop glaring at him. "I can go with you."

Ezra continues the rest of the way down the list. I decide to say nothing until he's done...

"Why did you show me the list?"

He already knows that I want to do the bucket list with him; it's obvious, but he's asking me anyway. And maybe beyond his awareness of how badly I need him for this, I see something else in his stare. Like he's looking for a specific answer that he's certain is already there, and he's urging me to realize it for myself.

So when I say, "Because I don't want to keep anything from you," I can't help but wonder at the slightest disappointment I catch in his eyes. I might have imagined it because he smiles at me softly just as soon. "And I really, really want to do the bucket list with you. Like everything else." I add hastily, with a teasing jab to his side, "I've been doing teenager-ing all wrong, and who better to help out the good girl than the cool guy, right?"

At that, Ezra laughs. I know my words worked because he shakes his head, hands me the list back, and says, "Okay. Let's go then, good girl."

This is what turning 20 sounds like…

For advanced reader’s feels, listen, save, and share the official playlist while waiting for the release of “The ‘Before 20’ Bucket List”!